The Husband in the Background

The Husband calls almost every other day. We fight and fight and then we hang up the phone. I start to feel queasy and when I go to sleep at night I start to wonder about the "nightmare" that I am in.
I can't sleep and then I toss and turn and wonder why we even met in the first place!

It seemed right when we first met. It was great when we talked on the phone. We talked all of the time before we were married and we talked all of the time after we were married. We talk all of the time now and so I just can't accept that we are not staying married. I do in the waking world but when I go to sleep I scream at the forces of nature about why this became so screwed!!

Luckily he often feels the same way too. So we are now in a happy form of denial. We say we will stay together. We plan on seeing each other. We plan on living together again. We fight over the future about what state we will live in. He wants to live in Florida. I want to stay in Denver. We talk about moving to Washington State. We talk about moving to Utah, Arizona or New Mexico. We can't agree fully on anything or any state. He doesn't care that I got everything going here. I am starting to settle in and the case managers tell me of course not to uproot again. I will do what the professionals say because they said "they see this time and time again." Just when the wife is starting to make Head Way the husband has to try to control the situation again. So this is what I am dealing with.

Anyway I already put in for Child Support. We are waiting on that. I also moved into the Transition Apartment and I have 2 years to get on my feet financially. Sometimes he sends me 100.00 for coffee on our bank card, sometimes he sends another 100 for my son's clothes or things. He seems to think that he is doing the best that he can. Although we already calculated that he makes around 3500 a month because he is Truck Driving long distances. I talked to a Defense Lawyer and a Family Lawyer and asked if we could throw him in Jail for what he has done. Unfortunately there are no laws established at this time to protect a wife and child (children) from destitution.They did say that later I can sue him for damages at a later time.

I don't have the money or time to deal with this issue. I am sure the Child Support will kick in soon.